Lady of the Isle

Wow! It's a new year, boy that did seem to go fast! I'm kind'a glad it did though, it was a pretty hard year especially in the Grandparent department and the stress with university department. I hope this year will be more gentle. I have this overall feeling of self reflection. It feels like I want to undergo a big change in path in my life, but I'm not ready to do it yet because I have to get through this part of my schooling. It a strange way to feel. Song like <i>The End</i> and <i>Closer</i> by the Kings of Leon have been the best way I could describe the feeling. It's a strong feeling but also not judge mental angry, its wistful and maybe mellow/a bit sad happiness?

I do feel  good about Never a Legend, the manuscript is coming along slowly but it's coming along faster than it is has in years. I'm still very unsure about  my writing, my inner critic saying that it's terrible and no one else will want to read it. On the other hand I think I might be (crosses fingers and hopes to not jinks herself) to the point where I have my own writing voice. That's super exciting, but I'm not entirely sure its the case yet, here's hoping! I'm nearly done with chapter two's rewrite. I'Il give one and two to Tyson first. I'd like to give him one two and three together, but I'm worried about how one and two sound so I can't wait. Right now I hope the beginning isn't so sad the readers will dump the story. Conversely Robert's journey starts on a hard low and it's his arc to built it back up. I made a New Years resolution to schedule a time to work on NAL once maybe twice a week and to stick to it! This is the year I want to finally get a draft of the manuscript! My college schedule is a little more flexible this term. I have my classes on Tuesday and Thursday with a PE class on M&W to make sure I come in to get course work done. I'm planning to at least make a time on Friday to write, possibly one other time in the week if coursework allows.

I'm looking forward to the new term, but at the same time I'm a bit gun-shy after this past term. Social Theory was a difficult class and professor Crowfoot not agree with the way I write I tested poorly and worked quite the shitstorm of anxiety. This combined with not getting my meds at the very end of term caused an incomplete *face palm*. I've been working on the incomplete at my own pace this Christmas break, of course it's not finished yet *ugh self*. I just need to get over than brick wall about anxiety of writing for this course! I will go get something to eat here shortly and see if that helps. History Seminar 405 was really interesting and I learned a lot about Steppe Nomads. Having professor Walton is really great too she's so knowledgeable. It's also great to feel like I'm getting done with my history requirements and progressing in the degree. I also really like writing the bibliographic essay I will definitely use it as a tool in research in the future.  However it was also pretty painful. We had about 200 pages worth of reading per-week considering its a senior level class that isn't that bad, but with my learning disability and ocd I can't read quickly and I was so afraid all term that I would fail the course. For this class there was a happy ending, I think professor Walton appreciated my  effort and discussion in class. I hope she liked my essay I may find out soon since I'm taking part two of the course this term.

I think I'm going to have to do a part two to this post to talk about the courses for this coming term and other future school developments. I think I'm going to grab some food stuffs now, I'm--so--hungry!